Thursday, January 21, 2010

New Beginnings

I know my title sounds a bit trite, but I am staring down a LOT of new beginnings right now. Pete and I have begun looking for places to rent. We're checking out houses that we mostly know we don't want just so we can get a feel for the neighborhoods. We're not ready to move until we get a few more things worked out, so the places that are available right now aren't actually the ones we could apply for anyway. But our town is filled with a lot of the same few models for single-family homes, so it's worh knowing that we DO like the Hibiscus II model, but NOT the Matheson model. Even if one isn't open right now.

And the neighborhoods here are wonky. You could be driving down one street looking at mansions with big walls, and gates, and lots of balconies that just make you assume this is the house that hosts Operah's book club. Then you take a side street from there and you think, "There are more teeth in this car than there are on this street!" So we need to look around. Also, I think the more I look, the more I like the townhouses here. A lot of them have fun layouts, and I sort of like the idea of the bedrooms being upstairs, rather than off of the main living space. So we'll see, you know?

Lucian starts school this coming Monday. I can't wait! Not at all in the way I'm supposed to, though. I can't wait, because the wondering will be over. It's like the difference between slowly climbing in to a pool in winter and jumping in. While you're climbing in, you have time to think about how awful it's going to be once you're submerged. But if you jump in, you just have to figure out how to deal with the suck. I'm sure that it will suck. I know every kid (except for home-schoolers, I guess) goes to school. Some like it, some don't. But either way, I lose my little boy. He's going to have friends that I didn't make for him. He's going to have to use what I've taught him to make good decisions. He's going to have to be responsible, and motivated, and honest, and and and... And I'm terrified.

Is this normal? I should probably seek proffessional help, but who has the time?

I feel like I'm embarking on a journey. I hope that it leads to happiness, and contentment. But I fear it's going to lead to the assylum.

2010 has a lot expected of it. I hope it can meet my desires.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

2010 - a breath of fresh air

So, it’s 2010. I think it may have been 2008 the last time I wrote in here. 2009 was a cocksucker of a year, and I don’t think I want to rehash any of it. Well, except to say that Christmas morning was so exciting for my boys that Val actually woke up first! And Lucian was so happy with all the presents he received that he literally couldn’t contain himself (read: He shit his pants! LOL).

So, now that that’s taken care of, let me get on with 2010. This is going to be a banner year for me, I think. We have plans in the works. We have vacations planned, if not actually scheduled. We are going to move back to the part of town that had us feeling like we had reached Nirvana. We’ll both be able to get to the gym regularly, so we’re going to get even MORE sexy than we already are – hard to imagine, I know. And Lucian is starting school. It’s just VPK, which is Pre-Kindergarten for those of you not in the know. It’s a full day 8:30am to 2:30pm from January 25 – May something-or-other. I’m very excited, and I’m very nervous.

Today, Lucian and I went shopping for school supplies. We bought the bookbag, lunch box, folders, a binder, markers, paints and paintbrushes, art smock, pencils, sharpener, crayons, scissors, and um… more stuff. He’ll be going to a school that specializes in performance art, so we also bought ballet shoes and tap shoes. I think I may have to buy some tap shoes for myself; they look like lots of fun! Next pay, I’ll be taking him out to shop for clothes. This is where it starts to get difficult, because here in Florida, winter doesn’t last too long. I don’t want to buy him too many wintery things, but at the same time, I don’t want him going to school in the same outfit day after day for weeks, either. Financially, this shopping trip is difficult too, because his little brother doesn’t really need lots of new clothes like he does, but they like to match when they go out, and Val gets a bit jealous when Lucian gets new things and he doesn’t. I should be saving our money for things like vacations and bunk beds, but I fear my desire to spend it all on consumables. I guess we’ll just have to see.

I think I’m going to try to contain my nervousness until we get closer to the actual first day of school. Otherwise, I may just spin out of control. If you have school age kids, what were your biggest fears, and how did you handle them? If your kids are still too young, what kind of goals do you have for your child(ren) once they are ready for school? Would you choose public or private school? Why?